How do you decide where to go for Christmas?

This seems to be an argument my s/o and I have every year lol. My family lives about a 10 hour drive from where we live, and his family lives about a 7 hour drive from where we live. I have two cats, and the last two times I went on vacation the cats didn’t do too well (Herbert wouldn’t eat, and Cola got constipated and a bunch of acne) so I don’t like the idea of leaving them unless I have to. Last year we spent Christmas at home and his family came out to see us. The two years before that we actually lived with my Dad, so we were with him. And the year before that we flew out to see his family.

So now we’re at this year, and he’s really pressuring me to go to see his family for Christmas even though we have no one to watch my cats and also no money lol. I don’t know what to do. Also I hate traveling, I’m terrified of planes/heights and also icy mountain highways lmao.

 

It sounds like it's pretty even with respect to which of your respective families you've spent recent past Christmases with, and given that your cats don't do well when you're away and money is tight, I would push for staying at home. How much fun will it be for you worrying about your cats, stressing over the travel and spending money that would be better spent on something more sensible?\

Could your Dad come to visit this time?

 

I’m not a huge fan of my dad driving in icy roads either

I wouldn’t mind spending Christmas in bed tbh

My s/o has young siblings tho, so I guess that’s another point for his side. They still do the whole family/present/Christmas decorations/etc and there’s only so many years like that before everyone grows up and it’s even harder to track them all down.

I just don’t want to leave my cats at the vet for a week, they both require medical care that I wouldn’t trust a neighbour to understand so they get stuck at the vet when I’m away.

 

All good points...and I know from experience that many people don't understand when you say "I can't leave my cats that long." They look at you like you're a bit touched in the head... One of my cats has never willingly allowed a human being to touch her except for me. She would be miserable if I put her in a kennel or even left someone housesitting to take care of them. She'd simply hide the whole time, and I'd be worried the whole time I was away.

I thought maybe your dad could catch a plane or a train, etc.

 

Exactly! Both of my cats are afraid of strangers, and I got my girl cat 3 months ago. I don’t want her to think I’ve dropped her off at another shelter She didn’t do well in the shelter for the year she was there.

My dad is the same but with his dog. He only drives, because the dog has to be able to come with him lol

 

Yeah, dogs generally handle traveling in a car much better than cats. When I take mine to the vet, about 30 minutes away, I have to put them in a carrier, and they yowl the whole way there and back. I have to get the carriers out the day before, because they recognize the sound they make and know what's up...LOL!

All the dogs I've ever had were always eager to hop up in the back of the SUV and go for a ride. Getting to go in the truck was a red letter day for them.

But back on topic...how feasible would it be for your s/o to go visit his family and then the two of you could either celebrate together either before or after?

 

One year his family, one year yours.

 

Maybe he’d be willing to let me stay here, idk tho. Hopefully his brothers gf can’t go either so I won’t look as bad

 

Just tell him the truth. It's a valid excuse

 

I did tell him, but he doesn’t take my cat mom duties seriously

 

I don't know but I would suggest to be like the Super Bowl -- Find a neutral site that is more convenient in terms of distance and invite both families and bring the cats?

 

I celebrated Christmas with my family in our garden.

 

We always see his family because they're only 10 hours away vs. 24 hours like my family. Also, it's hard enough weather wise and time off from work wise to see his family, mine is just impossible.

 

We celebrated our Christmas in garden with family and friends.

 

Are you related to Cynthia?

 

I celebrated Christmas with my friends.

 

I just see where I am and find a seat and sit down.

 

I hate my family so I hope I never have to spend xmas with em again lmao

 

1 John 2:11 - But he that hateth his brother is in darkness, and walketh in darkness, and knoweth not whither he goeth, because that darkness hath blinded his eyes.

 

I just go eat a nice meal with my mom and hang out with some friends, really, Christmas is about time off work and catching up on sleep.