I made a 3300+ character conspiracy theory

Discussion in 'Attention Seekers' started by mei, May 21, 2019.

  1. mei

    mei Newbie

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    This is meant to be retarded.

    "You see, NASA and the CIA have been working together to control America’s population. First they start out by putting heavy toxins into our childrens vaccines and giving them AirPods which are scientifically proven to cause autism. Next, they go to big fast food companies and say that they have cost-cutting measures by using the GMOs. Afterwards, the CIA dumps liquid fluoride in the water, which in turn converts the kids and the frogs into homosexuals. Who in their right mind would lead this you say? The reincarnated corpse of John F Kennedy that was kept in Guam so that the public didn’t have to hear of the CIA’s dark necromancy spells. The reason? To get revenge for all the critics of the failed Bay of Pigs invasion. For those who don’t know, the Bay of Pigs invasion was when America backed Cuban exiles to invade Cuba to overthrow the Communist government there. It was a failure, and all of the exiles were either killed or captured. The reincarnated corpse of JFK wants to get revenge on the populace of America by controlling the population then enslaving them to their iPhones by using the AirPods which cause autism and then the population of America is in the hands of the one true leader, Bill Gates. Bill Gates has been trying to get a new world order ever since Windows XP came out, and with this JFK revelation, now is the time for him to do so. Also, the moon landing was fake and Watergate didn’t exist.

    To add onto that, the Illuminati was behind the making of the juice beverage Hi-C. Hi-C was used as a brainwashing agent to get answers out of the Soviet spies that they later executed. Now, its sold to the masses to brainwash little Timmy to accept the AIDS virus as a gift from the United States Treasury. The Chinese were also experimenting this by creating humanoids that look identical then sending the real people to labor camps so that the world believes the facade that the Chinese humanoids aren’t humanoids, but to make them think that they are actually humans. Wonder why most Chinese people look the same? That’s proof that the Chinese are using humanoids to do the dirty work for them. Also, Planet X is coming for the disk-shaped earth that we live on so that the aliens with HIV can infect the Republicans. Wonder why the producers from the Matrix became women? That’s because the original directors got too close to the truth that we are all living in a simulation, so they were erased from the reality simulation code. Gravity was an experiment gone wrong by the Russians to try to get Americans to not fly butt it went horribly wrong. Bill Gates was working with NASA to fake the Apollo moon landing mission. As you know, the moon was actually an oblong oval and it was impossible to land on it, because there is no flat surface on an oval! Simple geometry, but the deep state runs all the science inquiries to make the public think that the moon is actually a sphere. Also, if it was made of rocks, wouldn’t it sink to the earth and then hit it? Proof that the moon was actually made of a lot of gray hot air balloons merged together to make one big sphere. Also, the moon should not be visible in the sky. How does it show in the night sky then? Its due to a bunch of mirrors the Americans threw on there to fool people into believing that the moon gives its own light. We’re all just puppets for the President."

    Total character count: 3362
     
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  2. PriestoftheHigh

    PriestoftheHigh The Joe Shogun chopslash Plus Member

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    Last week I read one where it said a meteor was hurdling towards earth and in this week's paper it says we were miraculously saved at the zero hour by a koala bear bird mutant fish
     
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