Let's talk about our first relationships

And how hilarious they were compared to actual mature relationships
How much do you even remember about them?
When did you start dating your first bf/gf and what was it like?
Did you parents set an age limit before you were allowed to date?
Did they drive you and your S/O to the movies etc?
Do you remember where you went on your first date?
How long did the relationship last?

 

I was 11 years old, lol. But there was this couple that was in my class. The girl was really tall and the guy was really short and it was funny when they kissed standing up, lol. It looked like a mother kissing her child before he ran off to catch the bus, lol.

 

My first girlfriend had really hairy arms.
But boobs and Male hormones so....

 

Lol is that all you remember about her?

 

What is it like getting boned and macking on her tits at the same time, lol?

 

She was dumb as shit too.

 

Dumb and hairy..... nice lol my first bf was kinda the same, maybe they knew each other

 

You should have had her chew some bubble or chewing gum.

 

My first relationship was last year, my 2nd relationship was fatass French bitch. Both were mature af.

 

Did you ever say "I love you"? Or be comfortable enough to let them hear you on the toilet? Those are the markers of a truly mature relationship.

 

Did she look like this?

 

My first official "boyfriend" (I feel I was in a weird internet relationship before that tbh) was with this guy I worked with in England. I was 18. He was nice enough. Told me he loved me superrrrrrrrr fast. My heart had just been tramped on by someone else so I wasn't sure what to make of it. My visa wasn't forever, he said we should get married so I could stay. I noped out of there. We had been dating 5 months lol.

He was a good guy. We never fought. I liked him enough. He was just too into me and I wasn't ready for what he wanted to give me. I really broke his heart. I feel bad.

I never really dated anyone before that because I was in an off again / on again internet relationship with english josh. I mean, we had met and stuff. It was complicated. lmao

 

I was 12 and I said to myself back than I need a gf and I found one. I was a zombie back than, as we know, and I was a total idiot. She dropped me in a matter of a week or so. And I never got another gf.

 

My first girlfriend was in grade 6 in Saskatoon, it was never official, but we ate candy and kissed under her back porch. No tongue, just touched lips. All my friends teased me, and then summer came and I moved to Red Deer, never talked to her again.

My next was when I was 15 working at McDonalds, co-worker. I was still innocent and shy. She dumped me because she thought I was frigid - I was not, but she wanted to get fucked, and I wasn’t forward enough. She was kinda dumb but super sweet and pretty. I regret not bangin her, because I had one of those never stop sex drives and a boner that orgasms didn’t chase, I could go and go and go.

Next relationship I had was when I was 18, and we pretty much spent 3 months humping 8 hours a day. We barely talked, just hung out and boned. She had huge boobs and a bangin body - also lived in a group home, so you know she was filthy. All my friends had tried to bang her but she decided to bang me instead, I was flattered and had a lot of fun. She told me if she got pregnant she’d disappear because she liked me too much to be a burden on me. She vanished. I might have a kid out there somewhere

 

that's her!

 

Hate to break it to you but that's a guy. You can tell because he has a prominent Adam's apple.

 

I don’t think you can distinguish male from female Neanderthals by Adam’s apples - females have them too in home sapiens, they’re just smaller and usually not noticeable. In Neanderthals they were likely more prominent in everyone

 

But Neanderthals were attractive sexually to humans because there's evidence that they've mated with each other before.

 

Could have been rape, the physically stronger neandrethals probably kept homo sapien women as sex toys

 

Homo Neanderthalis and Cro Magnon (early homo sapiens) were quite similar. It's not unthinkable that they met and possibly "paired up"