Should I apologise?

Discussion in 'User Topics' started by adams7012, Sep 12, 2016.

  1. adams7012

    adams7012 Newbie

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    So before I get to the point and the reason I decided to register and write here, I'll try to explain the background of everyone and everything that is included. (English is not my native tongue.) A week ago, I went on a vacation with two of my friends and my cousin. She is two years older than me. During the vacation everyone of us had a great time, we really enjoyed it and had amazing fun. Of course there was one or two times when I got into a stupid argument with her (my cousin). If I think about it, reasons of those arguments were and ARE an absolute nonsense. Both of us got angry at each other and didn't talk for few hours. The second time it lasted more than one day. After when I realised that it's stupid to be negative and stubborn now, when we were on a holiday, so I always broke the silence and kind of got back together with her. (Sorry, I can't find better words for it). She was as stubborn as me but was a really good sport when I started talking to her again.


    The vacation was ending and we were at the café at the airport waiting for our flight. I had to buy some presents for my family so I left my cousin with the others. I quickly bought some stuff and came back tired. (It was 4 am, we hadn't had any sleep, and had hangover from the last evening) After the soon return to our country, a ride would be waiting for us to drive us from the airport to home. Jokingly, I repeat, jokingly I mentioned that we could take a train (in our country, students have it for free, so theoretically we would save quite some money) but of course I wasn't serious. The ride was already arranged and it couldn't be called off AND I also wouldn't want it to be called off. I just simply made (probably a stupid) joke. However, my cousin didn't take it as I planned it. It was the first time (and we've been together since we were little kids) she looked at me the way I felt horrible about myself. She also started loudly criticising my behaviour, how I'm irresponsible person and etc. I said I didn't mean it like that but she didn't care. I had mixed feelings and didn't know what to do. Later, in the plane, I tried to talk to her but she gave me just one-word answers.


    Now, it's been 5 days since our return to home. Firstly, she didn't call, then she wrote me if she could visit me but I didn't reply as I had no clue what to expect or to do once she would be at my door. (If she would be behaving as nothing happened, I would probably turn into Satan on the Earth.)


    We are both students studying in the same city (different schools), we live in the seperate apartments not too far away from each other. We both left our parents with the agreement to take care of ourselves and help each other as a family. I feel like she knows she might have taken it too far and I don't have problem to admit that I should have reconsidered my words and actions.


    My question for the community here is, should I just accept the destiny, be the big brother and apologise (of course with no expectations of her apologising too) or should I keep waiting for her to do the first step (and by the first step I don't mean request on Facebook to play Candy Crush together) ? I once again feel that I start to miss her. Eventhough I'm younger, I've always been protecting her and taking her as a little sister no matter how bad and f- up things were between us...


    Thank you for your time reading this, and I'll gladly read every one of your opinions from you. Hope you have a great day!
     
  2. Cib3rNaut

    Cib3rNaut Guest

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    I am not partial to my cousins so my answer may be much different than others, You have written a statement to a random board explaining in such pretenses and intense wording if you should apologize, maybe your efforts would have been easily solved if you just wrote an email of the same caliber to that person in direct. If you have to spend so much time taxing yourself on such a matter it will only get worse to continue thinking about it. Just face the problem directly, Regret only make a person weak and depressed, there is no other solution. And if you get rejected then you know the problem is not with yourself it is with them and just forget it ever happened.
     
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  3. ani.ama

    ani.ama Newbie

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    Firstly, the key to understanding some one is to know how to make a joke and when to make such joke. Also the mood of the person determines how receptive the person would be towards you.

    Furthermore, I would say that the way u say something should expressly be seen on your face. Just as you said JOKINGLY....

    So get back at her and settle your difference
     
  4. Wrecky

    Wrecky Valkyrie

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    I think this is the first time I am quoting @Cib3rNaut for truth, but that was some really good advice. Totally agree :)
     
  5. Cib3rNaut

    Cib3rNaut Guest

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    That advice was only for the OP, you will need to gather your own advice somewhere else or post your own thread asking for advice as this thread was a personal response to only one Nexopian
     
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  6. djfly

    djfly Smiter of Spam

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    TL;DR

    Also, @Wrecky got TOLD!!! lmfao!
    One Internet point to @Cib3rNaut

     
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  7. Wrecky

    Wrecky Valkyrie

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    LOL @djfly
    I was just giving him a compliment, every once in a while I like to be nice to @Cib3rNaut (because I suspect he's at least part human) ;)
     
  8. Cib3rNaut

    Cib3rNaut Guest

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    Because this is the internet, I could only assume your compliment was factual. Over the past lifetime most were fake, so I am kinda hesitant about accepting your kindness. I'd rather you just say the truth, and proceed with the insults. Good or bad insults that is
     
  9. Wrecky

    Wrecky Valkyrie

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    Awwe, now I just wanna give you hugs!
    To be clear, I did think you gave good advice. Compliment was sincere but if you're more comfortable with abuse I can do that too :)
     
  10. Cib3rNaut

    Cib3rNaut Guest

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    Well now that you mention it, the constant abuse received has probably diluted the effects your wordings have on myself. So abusive forth comings from yourself would really be kind words spoken in comparison since the average postings on here referring to one Cib3rNaut haven't been all that bad. On the ratio of making terrible abusive claims you world have to post approximately several times your post count to make an effect worth measuring in the negative
     
  11. Wrecky

    Wrecky Valkyrie

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    Has someone been cyberbullying you?
     
  12. Cib3rNaut

    Cib3rNaut Guest

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    Yeah, Wrecky all those nerds are ganging up on me. I can't handle the pressure anymore
     
  13. Cib3rNaut

    Cib3rNaut Guest

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    Some weirdo keeps spamming craigslist and everyone's fag beta audio players, I am getting so tired of this. It's like everyone is a homeland terrorist with the IQ of a pencil. Pretty sure the source of this never ending harassment is an RCMP Officer. They couldn't let go of one employee before they started this nonsense, and now the lie is so big it's probably like 10 people covering each other in a mess of lies and withdrawn deceit. That had nothing to do with anything. Canada is Racist as **** and should DIAF
     

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